


The Very Next Day, You Gave It Away

by parrotfish_elliot



Category: Hamilton - Miranda
Genre: Cheating, F/M, John is small, M/M, This song is so lams, last christmas
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-12-13
Updated: 2016-12-13
Packaged: 2018-09-08 09:25:45
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,162
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/8839273
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/parrotfish_elliot/pseuds/parrotfish_elliot
Summary: Last Christmas, John gave him his heart. But the very next day, he gave it away.





	

John had never been the type to trust people with his love, devotion, happiness- not without many months, years even, of knowing said people. He was also never they type of person to take betrayal well, and therefore it is very easy for him to take away his greatest gift. It was also very easy to hurt him, though, so he kept his list of friends remarkably short.

 

One of the few people on his list was Alexander Hamilton, who, while a year younger than him, was every bit as feisty as anyone John had ever known. He was somehow quickly worming his way into John’s heart, even though it had only been four months since John had met him at the beginning of the school year. His words, his smile, his cautious nature, his will to fight- it all enticed the South Carolina boy. He planned on admitting this to him on Christmas. He was planning on telling Alexander something he could never tell anyone other than his sister- he trusts him, he loves him. 

 

He told all this to his other friend, a Frenchman by the name of Lafayette, who responded simply with a giggle and a handful of glitter. Predictably, this is what he did when he took it upon himself to ‘bless a gay’. John just rolled his eyes and walked away.

 

He planned every bit of his admission, to the letter, to the annunciation. When Christmas came around, he panicked. He chewed his nails, wrote himself letters, washed his turtle- then went out to face the world. To face Alexander. 

 

As usual, the Caribbean boy was snuggled up in the library on Christmas, avoiding people. He didn’t celebrate it, but did humor his friends when they got excited about it or gave him gifts. Without a word, John sat in front of him, tapping his book.

 

“Hey, Alex.” He whispered, smiling. Alex jumped, dropping his book.

 

“John! Hi! Where’d you come from?” He rambled, blushing. John rolled his eyes.

 

“The door. Anyways, I gotta tell you something!” He rushed out in response, eyes alit. Alex nodded, and waited for John to continue.

 

“Okay so, I don’t usually- ever, actually- trust people completely, with like, my entire life, you know? Cause, like, that rarely works out. But like, I trust you. A lot. You know?” It was John’s turn to ramble now, John’s turn to turn beet red. He was metaphorically giving Alexander his heart, his soul. 

 

Alex smiled, bright eyes even brighter. He paused for a second, preparing his words, as it seemed that all senses of elegance and eloquence had left the room. When he opened his mouth, though, words just seemed to spill out. “That’s good, right? Okay, yeah, well see, I,um, I find you quite interesting and attractive, with your freckles, and hair, and personality, and-” He was cut off by a pair of lips on his own. 

 

It took him but a moment to respond, but once he gathered his senses, he was kissing back with everything he had. It was pretty gay. Once the boys pulled away for the ever needed oxygen, they were bashfully looking at the floor.

 

Unsurprisingly, Alex was the first to speak. “So, um, what are we?” He didn’t want to stretch any limits, so he was treading lightly. 

 

“Can we be boyfriends maybe?” John mumbled, looking up at Alex hopefully. The shorter boy lit up like the christmas tree in the library corner. He nodded eagerly, actually silent for once in his nineteen year life.

 

That moment may have been the highest point in John’s life, if one was being melodramatic. Well, even without hyperbolizing and melodrama, it was the best John had ever felt in his memory.

 

They spent the night in the same dorm, not doing anything impure, just cuddling close, holding on for dear life.

 

The next evening was the evening of the traditional Christmas party. John Andre was hosting, so of course everyone had to go. He’s so pretty, okay? John and Alexander went together, hand in hand, and everything was perfect. 

 

There were so many drinks and alcohol infused foods, it wasn’t a surprise that they got drunk. Alexander was flirting with everything, much to John’s jealousy, and everything was brutally rejecting him, much to John’s relief.

 

Enter Eliza Schuyler.

 

The girl and her sisters walked into the party like they owned it, and it’s likely they did. They owned everything on campus, it seemed. Angelica was enveloped in a fur lined red dress, Eliza in a blue skirt with leggings paired with a kickass leather jacket, and Peggy was wearing a yellow onesie. 

 

Alexander’s attention was easily drawn to the three, away from John, whom he had been dancing with, for God’s sake.

 

Despite John’s soft protests, the shorter walked over to Eliza, introducing himself with a flourish. John’s stomach sank when she responded with a blush and giggle. Cue the merciless, stabbing flirting.

 

The boy told himself it was just friendly, playful joking, but was forced to bite his words when he watched Alexander, his boyfriend, his closest companion, the rightful owner of his heart, lead her down the hall to Andre’s spare bedroom.

 

He tried to run after them, to scream, to breath, but alas. He was paralyzed. He was frozen and cursing himself for ever trusting anyone. He had sobered up quite quickly, and was now shakily trying to call Lafayette to take him home. 

 

Not five minutes later, the Frenchman pulled up in front of the house, pulling John in the car swiftly. He turned on the radio, hoping to distract John, and causing John to focus on the lyrics ringing though the car rather than the tears dripping down his freckled cheeks.

 

“Last Christmas, I gave you my heart  
But the very next day, you gave it away  
This year, to save me from tears  
I'll give it to someone special…”

 

The lyrics, meant to help, just made John cry harder. 

 

He should have saved his heart for someone special. 

 

Someone who wouldn’t tear it in two.

 

Later, weeks later, Hercules called for a movie day. John, Lafayette, and Alexander. It had just been Laf and John and Herc, but then Alexander waltzed in. Three sets of tired eyes turned to him, one already bristling with tears. That pair closed quickly, and the body attached to them quietly walked out of the room to hide from Alex and his soul of ice.

God, he thought Alex was someone he could rely on. A face on a lover with a fire in his heart. But no. It seemed John had just been a shoulder to cry on. 

 

It took a year for John to find any semblance of peace with it, a year and many promises to himself that he wouldn’t make the same mistake again. Despite that, he knew,of course he knew, that if Alexander were to kiss him now, he’d be fooled again.

**Author's Note:**

> This song is so lams, I couldn't help but write it. I managed to refrain from sobbing while typing it up, though.


End file.
